The Fowl Manor
by Sapphire Sprite
Summary: This is an Artemis Fowl and Series of Unfortunate Events fanfic. After the Grim Grotto and The Opal Deception, the Baudelaires seem to have some more relatives. But could they be working for Olaf?
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: Neither Water Trainer or I own anything related to the works of Eoin Colfer or Lemony Snicket (a.k.a. Daniel Handler).

Ok, since this is our first AF and SUF work, so be nice please...oh, did I say? I worked on this with Water Trainer.

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In the Car, with Kit Snicket**

**(A/N: Quick recap. The Baudelaires are in a car with Kit Snicket, who is supposedly taking them to the last safe place.) **The Baudelaires felt safe. Here was a member of V.F.D., who was going to tell them secrets about their parents. Suddenly, Klaus cried out.

"A police car's chasing after this one! I think they think that you've kidnapped us!"

"Maybe we can make them lose us, if we go fast enough." Violet said.

"No. Kit'll just get a speeding ticket. The police probably already wrote down the license plate of this car. We have to get out of the freeway!"

But as thus the lives of the orphans were unfortunate, you may stop and get out of this fanfic immediately. Now, I will give you some time.

Thus, their chance of meeting V.F.D. vanished in a matter of minutes. During the frantic car chase, the car had skidded down off the road. Kit was arrested for kidnapping. Guess who was leading the car chase? No one other than the famous, proud, sneezing banker who had told them grown-ups didn't get in car chases.

**Fowl Manor**

"Dear, do get your best suit on. Your new brother and sisters are coming today!" Angeline Fowl exclaimed. "You _do _remember their names, don't you?"

"Yes, mother." Artemis sighed. "Violet, Klaus and Sunny."

"Good!" The doorbell rang. "They're here."

Standing at the door were three children. To be more precise, two children and a baby.

"Hello!" Angeline greeted happily. "Welcome to Fowl Manor!"

"Hello." Artemis's father greeted.

"Hello." Artemis mumbled, disappointed at the sight.

Klaus got interested in the library. Luckily for him, there were many books of all sorts there. Sunny found a bench she liked and started biting a chunk of hard wood she had saved from the Poes' reach. Violet found a tool bench. It appeared to them that they were in fashion (the fancy clothing) but were not obsessed with it like Esme Squalor. The Baudelaires then took their trunks into the guest rooms, now the children's rooms. Artemis hung around them to know them better.

"Stepbrother." Sunny said, pointing at Artemis.

"Yes, yes, Sunny. Let's hope Count Olaf doesn't find us here." Violet whispered.

"Count Olaf is the villain, I presume?" Artemis asked, overhearing.

"Yes, he tries to pilfer our fortune. He uses disguises, but no one but we recognize him! It's so exasperating. Also, he's responsible for kidnapping the Quagmires. Luckily, they're safely living in a domicile of their own." Klaus blurted out.

"So you're the reader? Violet's the mechanic, and Sunny here is the biter."

"How did you know?" Violet gasped. She and Klaus exchanged looks. Could he be an assistant of Count Olaf?

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A/N: Yes, these are five crummy pages. Please review! Water Trainer would be happy if you reviewed, too. I stand on my knees and beg! Or rather, _we _stand on our knees and beg! 


	2. Chapter 2

Is it just me, or does Artemis look a lot like Eriol from Card Captor Sakura? (Sorry for all those who don't know what it is...)

Disclaimer: If I own Artemis or The Series of Unfourtunate Events, I'd be rich, and making them crossover in the books. Oh, I can see the chaos...trust me.

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"I have my sources, scattered around...here and there... Well, are you coming?" asked Artemis, starting to walk down a corridor, near the back of the hall, outside their rooms. Actually, the second he'd learned about the Baudelaires, he'd immediately gone to Foaly to track down information on them.

"Yes," said Violet, quietly. The Baudelaires decided to follow him to see where he would lead them to. They went down to halls and into three doors, around corners, and up to a large black door. Artemis opened the large black door with a silvery-gold key with A.F. engraved into its side.

"Here we are," muttered Artemis, letting them go into his computer room. Inside were a couple dozen computers, and disks, piled next to every keyboard. There was one book that lay next to a sliver laptop that was set apart from the rest of the keyboards.

"Artemis...Why is this place under lock and key?" asked Klaus, walking up to Artemis.

"Because...Well, I'd like to keep that to myself." Actually, it was the database for fairy information. The Baudelaires decided not to ask, and just sat down near a computer, and caught up on current news.

"Uh...Did you know we were wanted for murder?" said Violet, looking at some old news.

"Probably from the Village of Fowl Devotes...Awkward isn't it our new "family's" last name is Fowl...Hmmm," said Klaus, starting to look for relations.

"Yes, it is odd, isn't it. I'll keep on looking at the news, for now," said Violet.

"OK." Klaus said. Sunny tapped onto some keyboards, and a computer came to life.

"Um, Artemis, is this supposed to happen?" Violet asked. But Artemis wasn't where he was the last time she'd checked. "Hello?"

"It seems like he isn't here." Klaus remarked. "Is this some sort of a prison cell?"

Sunny banged on the door. It was locked.

"Hello, Baudelaires." A silky voice sounded from the computer. "We meet again. Come...we have your friend, the twin..." The Baudelaires fumed.

Olaf knew clearly that Quigley was not a twin. He was a triplet, and they all knew that. Apparently, Olaf had been stupid enough not to remember, or he just said that to annoy them and make them mad.

"What are you doing to him!" asked Violet unhappily to see their dreaded enemy's face ever again. What she didn't know was that her computer had a microphone, and a video camera, installed by Artemis himself.

"Tsk, tsk... now, now orphan, you wouldn't want your friend dead now, would you," said Olaf, wearing a sinister grin on his face.

"You...you...Dirty, evil, scum!" yelled Violet unhappily to the screen.

"Now, now, I'm sure we can work this out, come to me, and your boyfriend will leave unharmed," said Olaf, switching that annoying smile, to an evil grin.

Violet heard what he called Quigley, but decided to ignore him and is comment. "What are you going to do to him?"

"Why, knock him out for a few years, and then collect his fortune," said Olaf, in his silky tone that promised death.

"Not if we can help it." Klaus glared through gritted teeth.

"Olaf no baka!" Sunny screeched. Apparently, she had learned Japanese, from someone we may never know.

"WHAT did you call me, little baby? A baka? We'll see who's the real baby soon, you baka. Hey, that actually makes sense." Olaf smirked, then the screen turned off.

"If I remember correctly, the word 'baka' is equivalent to 'stupid,' and not 'baby.'" Everyone spun around. There was their mysterious stepbrother. WAS he really an accomplice?

Artemis had lots of work to do. He had locked his new siblings in the room, transfixing them with the computer, and the so-called Olaf. Artemis had to grin on that one. Olaf was NOT in contact with them whatsoever. It had killed Artemis to make that error about the Japanese form of "stupid." Foaly had helped him. They'd worked out plans for months. They had come into contact with Holly and Mulch. The LEP wasn't doing so well, so the famous human genius HAD to give them a hand. "Come in, Artemis, come IN!" Foaly shouted into the computer. "We've got work. There seems to be this human who's getting into our contact! We've got to stop it! His name is..." Foaly trailed off. Artemis obviously wasn't there. Oh well, thought Foaly, at least I can get a carrot break. Holly can buy me some more carrots.

"Hey, how did you get back here?" asked Klaus.

"The door was opened," Artemis simply stated.

"I thought it was locked..." murmured Violet.

"It happens to the best of us," said Artemis, remembering Opal, and the "Arctic Incident."

"Well, we'll be exploring the house now..." said Klaus quickly walking towards the door.

"You'll need a map for that, won't you?" asked Artemis softly.

"There are maps?" asked a completely bewildered Violet.

"Yes, if you looked through the files in any of the computers there's a map, safeguarded, but a maps a map after all. I'd like to see how you're going to get in," said Artemis, settling himself in a comfy red chair next to a computer.

"Fine," said Violet, sitting down at the closest computer, which was also right next to Artemis. She found a file marked "maps" and started from there. Next she clicked on a paint project called Fowl Manor Map. What happened? A small box showed up asking for the password. Some of the things she typed in were: Japan, Artemisfowl (much to the displeasure of Artemis), Dark water, Artemisfowllovesgold (yet again, much to the displeasure of Artemis), Gold is power, Artemis Fowl, Artemis, etc...

"What are you trying to do? I'll give you a hint to unlock it," murmured Artemis who was becoming bored, "Myths," was all he said. As Violet had no idea what he was talking about she put in: Dragons, phoenix, centaurs, Artemis (for Artemis the Hunter), Zeus, Sirens, harpies, and finally fairy. Once Violet typed out fairy the screen said "Password correct," and showed another box asking for another password...

"Okay," muttered Violet who was also becoming bored.

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A/N: If you see that the characters are becoming to OOC, then blame Water Trainer, not me. I KNOW that Artemis wouldn't do the thing at the end; he'd rather make very tricky clues, or do it himself.

Please R&R!


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